Tuesday, May 30, 2006

bizarro world

Last night, when my mind was awakened to the reality of what was taking place in my living room, I had to stop for a moment and take inventory of my life...make sure I was still the person I thought I was.

My wife was reclining on the couch with both legs resting on a stack of pillows, ensuring that her sore knee was higher than her heart. Normal.

I was lying on the loveseat, head rested on one armrest and legs draped over the other, while our dog slept in my lap. Normal.

She was watching TV and I was reading. Normal.

All normal.

But there is more to the story that made this night different than any other night in our marriage.

Last week, my wife finished a book entitled Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers. The book is a fictional reworking of the book of Hosea. She absolutely loved it and made me promise to read it as soon as I finished the book I was currently working on. I love the story of Hosea and Gomer and I don't read fiction often enough, so I considered it. BUT (and this is big "but" by the way) this is the cover of the book.

Yeah, I know. All it's missing is Fabio behind her with his shirt off, atop a white stallion.

But she promised me that it wasn't nearly as girly as the cover made it appear. And I am completely secure in my own heterosexuality. So last night, I picked it up and began reading. She was taking her usual evening nap, so I went a head and had the Pistons/Heat game on in the background while I read.

Well, she woke and, since she generally likes sports and the game was close, didn't ask me to change the channel. As the fourth quarter wore on, she got more and more into the game and started rooting for the Heat (actually she was rooting against the Pistons...is there any good reason not to hate that team?). And eventually, she even began vocalizing her opinions of the events that were taking place on the court.

That is when I stopped. Looked around. And realized.

We were in Bizarro World.

She was watching the NBA Playoffs and screaming at the TV, while I was curled up under a blanket reading a romance novel and snuggling with my dog.

I was scared and confused and...oh, would you look at the time. I'd better finish this up and post it.

The wife likes me to have dinner ready by the time she gets home from work.

4 comments:

The Anonymous Human said...

Is that how you got those two black eyes?

Dustin said...

kelli just read that book and I remember sitting on the couch as she finished the book and cried thinking, "i can't imagine crying because of a book"

The Anonymous Human said...

I can, but then I think "super systems" will do that to anybody.

bill said...

i don't say its chick porn. john piper says that it is. i just agree with him. but i must admit that it is enjoyable.